Getting over rejection

So aside from eating more, which I really need to put a halt on, I keep finding myself in horribly tragic situations with men these past few months. I am officially approaching my mid thirties which, apparently, is when many women are at the sexual peak. You know what makes being at a sexual peak difficult? Men that can't get it up. I mean, seriously! I keep wondering if I can get a sample pack of viagra or something to crush up and slip in the beer. Maybe I should just stop taking home guys from the bar between 2-7am.

Right, and maybe my ass with sprout wings and fly. That late in the night, I make poor decisions just like everyone else. The only difference is that I usually snag the cute drunks. Sometimes. Not always. But this flaccid penis epidemic has me freaking out! Is it me? Is it them?

Or should I just blame it on the al-a-a-al-al-alcohol?

To investigate a bit further, I asked a friend that I had been sleeping with for a bit at the end of last year. He assured me that in no way could sex the problem. Unfortunately he took my inquiry personally and assumed that I was broken up about him not sleeping with me anymore or something. Truth be told, he only had sex with me twice...maybe. All of the rest of the times he came to my house just so he wouldn't have to make the 30minute drive home. He also took advantage of falling to sleep while watching netflix with me.

Now, I have had men tell me that I am "too horny". Honestly, I think this is a cop out. Seriously, if I see you once or twice a week, had a few drinks, and want to ravage the sheets o my bed with you into the morning and maybe once in the afternoon when we wake up, how is that "too horny"? You guys talk about how difficult women are to understand, but look at you! You would rather watch a porn at home by yourself than sleep with that cute, nerdy  chick you were talking to. Maybe its just the guys that are closer to my age that this is an issue with. Looks like I am shooting for mid-early twenties again! Maybe they can keep their dicks hard.

Like Phil, this guy I met back in January. He is a chemist somewhere in town. We had a great conversation about where I related chemical solutions to either my job or certain aspects of life (I was drunk, he was hot, I don't remember). He was either twenty-four or twenty-two and definitely fun. I didn't get his number or any contact info the next morning. I don't even think I let him out of the house. I think I just told him where the keys were and sent him away. That's ok I can find him if I want to. He friend that introduced us works for my mom (kinda). I made out with that guys before, too. Now he lives in forever fear that I am going to tell my mom about him.

Leverage, bitches.

Have a great St. Patrick's Day, Everyone! And remember, if the dick is green, switch to the machine!